So someone had the nerve to question the authenticity of my kindness because they felt like I was throwing it back in there face. I find it hard to believe that someone would think that me of all people throw kindness by the wayside and throw it back at someone. Most people don’t know me and have no idea what I go through on a day to day basis, so the fact that they would question a helping hand, especially one from me is funny. I guess its to be expected though, you can’t please everyone.
I’m just going to say it like this, I’ll chalk up the outburst and the accusations to a bad day. We all have one, but the next person that does question how I roll, the next person to question how I get down, will get the real reality that we live in. Everything ain’t peaches and cream. We cling to the beautiful of what lies around us, forgetting that there is darkness around everyone corner, in everyone’s heat.
You try, really you do, try to help others, and sometimes it can be mistaken as greed. Someone questioned whether I am actually the person that I say I am. When I take the little that I have and share with you when you have nothing, what does that actually say about my character. I shouldn’t have to write down how I help people, but when someone gets to big for their britches it really burns me.
Haters: Haters are an interesting concept. Let’s look at the word hate first. By definition most people associate the word hate with negativity. So by extension haters is a word associated with negativeness. What is a hater though? Many over the years have tried to peg down one.definition, but the word hater of haters is different per person. One thing most will agree on is that a hater is someone that displays an extremely high amount of negativity towards you or someone close to you.
For me, I’ve never really had the expeirence of having a hater until now. Some people I have talked with define a hater as someone that tries to make light of your flaws, thus increasing there confidence with-in themselves. I’ve had enemies but never someone I could call a hater until now. Not to name this person, but they are constantly trying to make light of my flaws as if my insecurities will shake my confidence and thus bolster theres. Unforunately it does not work. It’s interesting to watch on a day to day basis. The person I am, and have become, and will become, has no interest in getting consumed by the jealousy, envy, or negative nature of a hater. In closing I will say, don’t let anyone shake your determination or what you are working towards.
Many people will agree, once a hater, always a hater. In my opinion once you give up the need to care about what others are doing around you, and only then, will you remove yourself from the hater lifestyle. Worry more about what you have going on and how to solve your problems and you will be less likely to become a hater. And remember… “Haters gon hate.”
A little credit ladies would be nice for the hard work that we as men put in. Especially when it comes to holding down the house hold. A man has many responsibilities and I think women sometimes forget all the things a man can provide for them. I’ve had the opportunity to meet and sit face to face with a lot of women recently. It has definitely been a learning experience. One of the many things I took away from those conversations is that women sometimes forget how much men put into the household. And ladies, before you jump down my throat let me explain my previous statement. What I pulled away from those conversations is not that women forget that men do a lot. They expect a man to do a lot of things. Not only do they expect for men to hold down the house, but they WANT a man who CAN hold down a house. I put ‘want’ and ‘can’ in bold because to a man what it sounds like is some women want a man to be domesticated and that the women forget all the things men do do for their household.
That’s not the case at all. They just want a man who can provide for them a house hold. A lot of women don’t want to see themselves as the bread winners of the house. They don’t want domesticated men but it’s not that they won’t be okay with being bread winners for awhile, but they don’t want to do it forever. They want a man that either has dreams for more (working his way towards accomplishing those dreams) or a man that is working his way towards bread winner status. But this leads me back to my main point. Ladies, you sometimes forget that on that journey to rise above childhood and achieve manhood a man is giving up a lot to you. You forget, it is what he is giving up that goes into the home. It may not look like he has a lot going on at the moment, but ladies I ask that you look at your man. Look at him for what he may become, not what he is at the moment. I know it may be hard to look at someone that way, but if anyone can do it, it is the real women that know what they want and know that they have a real man in their lives. Trust me ladies, when you see him achieve his goals, all you will be able to say is…”there it is…”
For many a men, we have had that one that got away feeling. What do I mean by this? Men sometimes feel like they had a girl that they let slip through there fingers. She was everything they were looking for, but for whatever reason, he messed up and she walked out his life forever. Most men will tell you that they have had one that got away, and those that haven’t either a) haven’t met her yet, or b) are married to her.
But where does this sort of feeling that “she got away come” from. The topic is hotly debated but, one of the common agreed upon ideologies is, men and women are locked in a “game,” the winner determined by who is more cunning than the next. I won’t go into details today about this “game” but it has a long history.
I give many men, who ask me, advice on how to deal with this situation, for I myself have been a victim of its reckless emotions. If you ever happen across this, “she got away feeling” I advise that you analyze what you did wrong, what went wrong, if anything, and what you could do better. These are just a few questions you should ask yourself, but ultimately I believe you need analyze the relationship.
By analyzing the entire relationship you can correct the mistakes you made. It is a process, a process that will take many months and evolve many times before it’s all said and done.This is not something that you can just discover over night. In closing remember, love is a process that comes with it’s ups and downs, its trials and tribulations. If your white buffalo got away, look to the future and try not to repeat the mistakes in your past. Otherwise you will just “Fade into the Background….”
In the wake of Whitney Houston’s death, a number of “band wagon jumpers” have flocked to hear Whitney’s music. It is no secret that Whitney had a voice like none other. Her talent for acting and singing has only been achieved by few artist (not Beyonce either!) and he voice has lifted many to tears, including myself.
But despite all of her achievements her life was plagued with, what many celebraties struggle with, drugs and alcohol. In her greatest interview with Oprah in 2009, Whitney confessed to a life filled with drugs, masking the pains of being an entertainer. The pain of constantly being in the spotlight. That’s not to say all entertainment is bad, but celebrities are known for their at risk behaviors…cough…cough Lindsey Lohan… cough… cough Amy Winehouse.
Friends and associates close to Whitney say she had kicked the habit after an ugly divorce from Bobby Brown. What many fail to realize is that Whitney grew up in New Jersey, a city that was known for it’s “hood life.” It may not have been as prominent as say Oakland or Los Angeles, but Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston shared many qualities that attracted the two.
Overall my feelings are ones of somberness. I hope that Whitney is in a better place. I always wonder if there are ever concerts in heaven and God can see who is preforming on what day? If so, he has had some major acts in the last 20 years and I know that angels will enjoy the heavenly voice that Whitney was blessed with. Our prayers go out to the family of course as they struggle through this tragic time and as we remember Whitney for her voice, actors and singers give tribute through their on renditions of her classics. One such classic will always remain timeless. In closing I will say, Whitney, no matter what, through the drugs and alcohol, you were one of my favorite artist, and “I will always love you.”
PS - I have combed through numerous artist who are trying to portray Whitney’s iconic songs, and honestly this girl, from GLEE for that matter, gave me chills in my bones similar to how Whitney did when I first heard her music. She sang her heart out in honor of the late, great, Whitney Houston and in my opinion gave a better tribute then even Jennifer Hudson.
Well, it’s been awhile I will say that and how so much has changed. I think it’s time that I had another heart felt posting, just to kind clear the air with my followers, with my friends, with my family, so here we go.
I’ve been feeling the stress lately, and by lately I mean a lot. This is how I classify my stress level. I’m either financial stressed, physically stressed, mental stressed, or spiritually stressed. I’m usually one or another, sometimes two, but it is usually managable. Lately I have been all four, and it’s taking its toll. There have been a few times in my life that I have been all four and usually I come out on top, but this time I don’t know. This time its bad… really bad, and honestly there has been no one here to help but me myself and I.
When people ask me how I am so strong, I always look at them like their crazy, cause honestly I don’t know how I make through half my days without exploding on someone. I’ve been told by love ones I will make, and I probably will, but there is nothing like having someone to help you up when you need it, and right now I could use a helping hand. Friends that want more then you can give, family that wants to be a priority, but doesn’t want to make the priority, and me who’s doubting the validity of some my commitments.
This next track… well it describes the beginning of a beautiful relationship with 2 people that I have come to call friends. One I have come to call my own brother, and find sometimes, water can be as thick as blood. If it weren’t for these two people I wouldn’t have had some of the best times, and some of the worst times of my life. I owe them much of my sanity. But I take this time now to recognize and appreciate the love and respect they have for not only me but for each other. In closing I hope the one of these days one of you will utter the words… “Marry Me.” And the bond that you two have created can be cemented forever in time.